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The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

Michelle Rhee News/Business. Michelle Rhee. (2013) Author Michelle Rhee. New. (CC)




San Francisco, CA, USA

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China 4, America 4, Towelie 3, Washington D.c. 3, Iran 3, Us 3, Michelle Rhee 2, Jon 2, Jon Stewart 2, Slimful 2, Ray Lewis 2, Wolf Blitzer 1, Maureen Dowd 1, Badger 1, Knute Rockne 1, Jacoby 1, Ellen 1, George Stephanapolous 1, Morgan Freeman 1, Beyonce 1,
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  Comedy Central    The Daily Show With Jon Stewart    Michelle Rhee  News/Business. Michelle  
   Rhee.  (2013) Author Michelle Rhee. New. (CC)  

    February 4, 2013
    11:00 - 11:30pm PST  

i'm so sorry! - he needs you to get better, towelie, please! - you got so many people that just love the heck out of ya, towelie. - all right! all right, i'll go! - you will? - i don't want to hurt washcloth anymore! - he's going, everybody! come on! hugs! [sobbing] [chatter over emergency radio] - poor wed team. their captain weally got waped. - i've never seen a kid get screwed by a shark before. hee! - i hope i never see it again. huh huh huh! - nathan, your team put up an amazing fight. and even though i was crowned king of cripple camp, i want you to know that you were the real ch-ch-champ! - i hate you, jimmy. i [bleep] hate you with everything in my entire being. - duh, you sure got it stuck it to ya this year, boss! - shut up...mimsy.
- hi, towelie? - yeah, hi. - towelie is definitely one of the most addicted towels we've ever seen here. he's probably the second most psychologically damaged towel i've come across since treating kirstie alley's towel, which had seen some... [shudders] some nasty stuff. - i don't know what tomorrow's gonna bring. but i'm learning to love what i am. i'm a towel. - ♪ veins swell ♪ you know me, ellen ♪ enough to tell ♪ five steps, you're over captioning by captionmax >> february 4, 2013.
from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. ( cheers and applause ) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. former chancellor of washington d.c. public school system michelle rhee is going to be joining us here. stay in school. don't drop out and get high and come to a taping of the show. and ask the host, what's is your script, man? what's on there? ( cheers and applause ) is it the letter g? we have fun here. listen. let's begin tonight with last night.
a sporting event know encapsulates the entire tee of what it means to be an american. an event know begins with an emotional salute to the victims of gun violence quickly gives way with a promotional salute to the glorifying of said gun violence. >> bang-bang time. jon: yes, it is. bang-bang time. didn't realize it had taken such a dark turn. we cheered as men committed brutal violence one another and then complained bitterly at the sight of two people kissing. and a multimillion dollar sound and light show was immediately followed by yet another sign that our basic infrastructure is on the verge of collapse. couldn't find a football movie where the lights went out. last night was a big bowl of super. anybody out there with red blood coursing through their veins watched the ravens squeeze by
the san francisco 49'ers all while eating food designed to stop red blood from coursing through their veins. don't mind if i do. anybody can pretend to be a real american and watch it. i take it up a notch. i skeet shoot while i watch. skeet shoot all the time, man. when i'm watching tv, i skeet shoot. inside. outside. that's not photo shopped. there's no way to photo shop a skeet shoot picture. as with any great american conflict, this game pit brother against brother. each wondering who would finally win the game and with it the long lost love of their parents. by half time with the score 21-6 it appeared the game was all but over. that's when she walked in. amazing vocals, breath taking
choreography and of course whatever this was. she even let two lucky contest winners join her on stage. you didn't like that one, huh? ( cheers and applause ) actually it was very nice to see destiny's child back together again or as george stephanapolous calls them the pointer sisters >> that's morgan freeman, i think. >> jon: never gets old. you know, after beyonce's performance, if you liked it, you should have put a fuse on it. just as baltimore's jacoby jones seemingly put the game out of reach... >> this is about a piece of electronic equipment that monitors the feeding into the stadium. officials are calling it, quote, an abnormality >> jon: oh, right. an abnormality.
(yelling) why did you (mumbling)? how many football players saw that? the wins and losses black out the performance aside, the real contest took place amongst america's foremost products who competed for the opportunity to be buzzed about. with an estimated global audience of everybody. the super bowl is the company's best chance to get its message across to america. messages like our candy feels pain when you eat it. and our chips are so good, even a goat will eat them. interestingly though, that ad wasn't the one that wound up being the most talked about. >> it might be the most controversial ad of the super bowl, this ad from godaddy called perfect match where super model bar rafaeli locks lips with a geeky-looking engineer >> jon: because she was kissing
a jew? is that why? oh, it's so disgusting to kiss a jew. is that it? what's that? i'm being told that that's not why people were upset. the source was apparently america's belief that affection should only take place between looks-equals. he's not a... (screaming). by the way how was this objectionable? but everybody was perfectly fine about the ad where the guy was clearly [bleep] his horse. ( applause ) i'm not saying i blame him. it was a fine lacking horse. in the end the ravens prevailed. the game was a swan song for 17-year veteran linebacker ray
loom it. ray lewis, i'm sorry. seen her portrayed as a very angry badger. the inspirational figure to his teammates lewis' story is complicated by some personal troubles. a little matter of... i'll let boomer explain >> he was involved in a double murder >> jon: involved in a double murder. a little double murder. as knute rockne used to call them, the old double murder-oo. in the pregame interview, ray lewis offered up a novel defense for his actions >> what would you like to say to the families >> to the family, if you knew, if you really knew the way god works, he don't use people who commit anything like that. for his glory. no way. it's the total opposite. >> jon: wow.
must be quite the comfort to families of those murder victims. the news that god makes sure everybody gets what they deserve. still that's the case. then criminal trials would go a lot faster. your honor, what evidence do you believe in the victim's blood found in my client's limousine? would god allow a murderer to go to 13? i rest my faith. by the end of this long and complicated day our senses had been beaten into submission and numbed by excess. just as i began to question this annual ritual of violence and consumerism, i saw this one final commercial. >> in the eternal debate for answers, the one thing that is true is what's true for you.
>> jon: and i realized after seeing that that i actually [bleep] the super bowl. guys getting hit really hard. beer trucks, chips. i found my answer sighen to go and it was inside my refrigerator the whole time. we'll be right b b..
( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome back. while watching the super bowl, americans always keep one eye or two on our biggest rivals abroad: iran and china. take your eyes off one second and they start pulling stuff. china, last week >> the "new york times" says hackers have been attacking his computer system for the past four months. >> chinese hackers reportedly stole e-mail passwords for every single "new york times" employee. >> jon: that's it? that's your big attack? you're the guys who beat the [bleep] out of us in math and science. you send your elite hacker squad out and all they get is maureen dowd's email address. it's like trying to starve us by disrupting our vegetable supply. you want our attention, hack our tv news. >> today as cnn tried to cover the news about the hacking story, the chinese government
blacked out the story. >> china is literally watching cnn on air with the finger on a button >> jon: that's not just the chinese. that's pretty much how we all watch cnn. >> i'm wolf blitzer. you're in the... >> jon: (jon hits button). ( cheers and applause ) i have to say, china, i'm not feeling that threatened. maybe iran could pick up the slack. >> now the greatest achievements of iran's space program to date, the islamic republic enters a monkey into space and recovers his safely. >> jon: or you could shoot a monkey into space. no one was more excited about this than the monkey himself. seen here doing his impression of hans solo in carbonite. iran, you think the c.i.a....
you just got pita on your [bleep]. that guys don't [bleep] around. not for nothing. a little propaganda advice. you can't brag to us. we did that 50 years ago. we had been launching space monkeys before you had us overthrow your democratically elected government. i'm sorry. it was eisenhower's idea. what's next, iran? >> this is the second time iran sent live animals into space. including a mouse, a turtle and a worm into orbit in 2010. >> jon: islamic space mouse, turtle and worm all of which inspired the hit, shia pets. (laughing) i just want to bring your attention to this.
there is actually a worm in a space suit. a turtle, a mouse, a monkey and there is a worm just in case... i believe old wormy is what they call him. one slight problem: somehow the monkey who got shot into space wasn't like the monkey who supposedly came back. that can mean only one of two things. either the launch was a dud and iran is covering up its failure or -- and i think this is more likely -- they have secretly built the first all primate orbital cosmetic surgery spa. the monkey gets a nip and tuck. any short-term swelling or bruises when he gets back, he's like i just got back from space. cut me some slack. you know who this will be huge about. the little outpatient procedure. nice. now that's a monkey i'd like to [bleep].
thyou eat weiyou lose it's a great plan... until you get hungry. that's the time to take slimful. one tasty 90-calorie slimful and a glass of water satisfies hunger for hours making it easier to eat smaller meals, and resist snacking. your friends might think you found the secret to losing weight. but it's no secret... it's slimful. eating less is a beautiful thing. welcome back. my guest tonight, she is a former chancellor of the washington d.c. public school. her new book is called radical,
fighting to put students first. please welcome to the program michelle rhee. welcome to the show. how are you? >> good. jon: radical. putting students first. it's so interesting. you inspire such... people either love you or they're real mad at you. you're somewhat of a controversial figure. does that... do you feel that? do you understand it? why would you say that? >> you know, when i first went to d.c. and became the chancellor there, it was the lowest performing school district in the country. i started making a lot of changes that i felt were obvious ones. close low-performing schools. cut the central office bureaucracy. remove ineffective educators. i was a little shocked when people started saying she's a lightning rod and a radical. because i thought what i was doing was just sort of bringing,
you know, order and reason to the system. so, you know, at the end of the day i feel like it's bringing common sense to a dysfunctional system makes me a radical then i'm okay being a radical. i think everybody should be one. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: sure. now, do you think... see, i am the son of a teacher. so i'm not... it's hard to be objective about it. do you think some of people's concern is what you might consider and obvious you say fired ineffective teachers, close some dysfunctional schools that they might be concerned that the metrics with which those are decided in their minds might be more arbitrary not to suggest that isn't a terrible bureaucracy in schools or there isn't any of those things but the reliance on the testing metric skewed some of the data for people and that they were concerned that those decisions were being based on arbitrary system they didn't necessarily agree with?
>> i come from teachers too. my grandfather was an educator. my grandmother on my mother's side. i have four aunts. my best friend. my sister-in-law. i've always been surrounded by teachers my entire life. that's why i have such an incredible regard for what teachers can do but when i got to d.c., i was leading a system where 8% of the 8th graders in the city schools were operating on grade level in mathematics when i got there. yet when i looked at the performance evaluations of the adults at the same time 98% of them were being written as doing an excellent job. you can't run an effective organization when you have that kind of a disconnect between, you know, what people are supposed to be doing and the results that we're producing for kids. now i think that without a doubt today's teacher evaluation system are broken. there's a move now to fix them. a lot of teachers are worried about the use of test scores and whether that is fair or not. i think that what we've got to do is focus on the system that
does... is fair and transparent for teachers but at the same time does hold folks accountable for the academic growth we see with kids >> jon: this is interesting. from any of the conversations i have with teachers they all talk about the frustrations that they have with this idea of the test being the all mighty word. that there is a math and reading metric that is established by the state or the federal government that does not in anywaanyany... any way measure a possible student's potential or success, a possible teacher's potential success. yet that is the thing they are tied to not just for their teaching curriculum but for money, for money for the school, for all these things. how do we, as you say, how do we move them from what they've established here because that's very recent, to what you're talking about, if what you're talking about is moving away
from the test >> what i'm saying is there has to be a balance. you don't want an overemphasis on the test. if that's the only thing that people are concerned about. yet you can't have no accountability, right? because we for a very long time in cities like washington d.c. and places across the country, we were producing generations of kids who were graduating from high school but they didn't know how to read and write and do math on grade level. so there's got to be a ball afternoons in there. and sort of a fairness in there about it. i think the bottom line is that there is no one in the country that i know of who is advocating that we evaluate teachers solely on the basis of test scores. i think that the vast majority of people who are reformers are saying we have to look at student achievement growth but we also have to look at other metrics and measures like observations of their classroom practice. surveys of kids in their classroom and the parents who send their kids into that classroom everyday >> jon: are we hanging them out to dry by coming in there every
three years and saying here's the new reform. it's the test. you're going to teach to that. if you don't increase your test scores by 10% you're fired. and then two years later come back in and go not that test, this test. you know, they're demoralized. they don't have any... it's like a football team that keeps getting a new offensive coordinator every year. it's very difficult to be inspired by that. schools are as much an art form. teaching is as much an art form as it is an objective reality >> so i remember talk to go a teacher when i was in d.c. once. she said, you know what? i'm a good soldier. i'm not a rabble rouser. i just want to do the right thing for you, for the kids, the district. can you just tell me what you want me to do because i have this huge state curriculum. i have all these learning standards. then i have the standardized tests that we have to take and these benchmark assessments and the teachers guide and the, you know, the everyday... all these things. just tell me what you want me to do and i'll do it.
right now there's just so much stuff. i think that is a frustration. we have to be very clear with our educators about what great teaching and learning looks like, what we expect to see when we into their classroom >> jon: the school system seems to have moved away from any practical reality in the modern world. there hasn't been any innovation in education since john dewey but, you know, there's that idea that we no longer have a connection to the way the real world works and the way schools should work in communities. it just seems like a much larger problem. teachers seem like one tool. with which to get education in this country back on track. but they seem to be the only tool that ever gets yell at. i just ruined my own metaphor. i had the whole tool thing working. >> hammered jon: exactly.
all kinds of... poverty, family stuff. communities. but teachers are the only one we look at and go, so, fix it. or you're fired. >> i think that the reason why people are paying so much attention to teachers and teacher quality is because the research is very clear that if all of the in-school factors that exist, it's the quality of teacher in front of the classroom every day that has the most impact on students' lives. does poverty matter? absolutely. that makes it much more challenging for kids to come into school everyday, for teachers to teach them effectively but the reality is that if we want to live up to the ideals of this country, the values of america and we want those kids one day to be able to escape poverty we know that the best tool to do that is through education. that's why we've got to make sure that every kid has a great teacher in front of them everyday >> jon: if you could stick around for a little, it seems like education can only be put in place once the soil is fertile. if the soil is not fertile, you
know, teaching in a barren environment is still a very difficult place to grow tools. radical. it's on the book shelves now. we'll have a little bit more with michelle